​How Much Crotch Can A Person Take?

Best Halftime Superbowl Show Ever?

By Bobby La Douche’

How many people on this planet watched the halftime entertainment during
the Superbowl? Perhaps over a billion. I thought there would be protests from
here to hell regarding the objectifying of women put on the air by J Crotch and
Shakyourass. Did they consult Harvey Weinstein about the stripper pole? BY
the way they found A Rod’s DNA on that pole after the show. At one point I
believe I saw a fallopian tube. Don’t get me wrong, if you are going to show me
your boobs, ass and a leather chastity belt than I will gladly look at the product.
I won’t notice the just average vocal talent on display. Proceed to chastise me
for looking. My compliments on the world class ass shaking as well. Hook a fan
blade to that butt and you would get 1000 Megawatts of pure sustainable
electricity. I realize that beautiful performers like these two cannot rely on their
prowess as singers and therefore we get the raw meat as a diversion.

The #MeToo movement must have had a stroke during this festival of poontang.
Is this what people have in mind about being all inclusive? Anything is alright
but it’s not really alright. What crosses the line and what doesn’t? I’m
surprised that J Lo’s daughter was fully clothed during the performance. Shake
your ass little one, shake your ass just like mamma.

Another stereotype was also solidified. The two performers were “hot blooded
Latinas”. Where were the Carmen Miranda fruit hats when they were needed?

I’m starting a new movement. It’s called the EATSHIT Movement. Every time
you sense hypocrisy you text EATSHIT to all your friends. You will have to
prioritize your texts otherwise you won’t get anything done.
On a side note the crotch is not the most beautiful area of the human body. It
mostly provides an escape route for waste products. It’s like looking at the back
of a garbage truck with trash hanging out.

Your Pal,
Bobby Port Hole La Douche’